7 days is a long ass time…


My next five days.

Readers, if were to give my last week a grade it would be a huge, f-ing F. It sucked! Just sucked. This is was my week. I got my port accessed and go into the infusion center on Monday. You have seen pictures of it before.

It’s cold in there. Why is always so dam cold? I am covered in warm blankets. They give me my pre fluids which takes half an hour. Then I get nausea medication. Then I get the chemo which takes three hours. My nausea medication makes me very sleepy, so half the time end up falling asleep, no work for me. When my chemo is done on that first day, I get hooked up to my little friend who will be with me the next 7+ days.

My little friend...

My little friend…


He sleeps with me too.

The first day was long because we first had to meet with Dr. D. at 11:30am. The Boy had Monday and Tuesday off from school that week so he was with us; what a way to spend your mini vay cay. Sorry Boy. I really would rather have been anywhere else.

The Boy an Me

The Boy an Me

My Boys one is reading the Hardy Boys book.

My Boys one is reading the Hardy Boys book.

So after Monday things kind of went to shit. We did not plan for a week of me being umber emotional, tired, stinky, (only sponge bathes and after a few cold ones, who cares any more) having high expectations on the state of house (fur balls having fur balls), having to eat and My Man running back and forth trying to work, picking me up from treatment and oh yeah, we have to pick The Boy up from school, make sure he eats, does homework (homework??) and make sure he bathes too. It was a mess. I was a mess. The pump makes a noise every 24 seconds and at times it is the loudest sound in the room and then at times I had to make sure it was working. It went with me everywhere I went. I had to make special place for it in the car, in the bed, while I peed etc. And as each day went by I just felt worse and worse. And cried more and more.

On Friday everyone at the treatment center were all cheerful saying “Yeah, It’s Your Last Day!” Yeah. No. I got to go two more days of this shit at the hospital. No weekend bullshit for me. One good thing. I got to sleep in. During the week, I had to get up to help Aidan get ready for school and get ready to go into treatment at 8:30am. No sleeping in. And I needed sleep because I was up one or two times a night cause I had to pee. Oh how I hate peeing. (I will say, I didn’t have to keep track of it (like in the hospital) so that was a major plus.) Treatment on the weekend wasn’t until 11:30am. The Boy was spending the night at the BF’s (Thank you Jennifer) so My Man got to stay with me all day on Saturday.

My own TV

My own TV

My Man working.

My Man working.

Hi. It is day 6 and I am not fine.

Hi. It is day 6 and I am not fine.

I liked the hospital treatment center. For one thing, it wasn’t as cold. I walked in there looking like the walking dead but they were still so nice. “Not feeling to well huh Mrs. Hamer”, “Getting enough fluids?” (always with the peeing!) “Getting enough sleep?” My Man liked the hospital infusion because he liked having his own TV for Game Day and the MSU game. On Saturday I slept through most of the treatment. I was so beat. I smelled. I hated peeing. I was so done. I probably broke down in tears 5 different times that day. The Boy spent another night out (reason 3 why I cried) so on Sunday My Man did not stay with me. He went and got the boy and they went shopping…puppy needs his food from Costco.

After my treatment I still had My little Friend with me. I won’t get rid of him till 11:30am on Monday. I drove to the doctors and I should not have been behind the wheel. I was not in any condition to drive but I had to go in and My Man has a job. What are you gong to do?

It is Tuesday and I feel so much better than I did the day before. And this is how it will be. I will feel better as each day goes by till I get to November 3rd and I have to start the whole damn thing over again.

10 thoughts on “7 days is a long ass time…

  1. I am sorry we could not be there everything came at the same time. Hang in there we will be available after December 8th. You sounded so much better today.
    Can’t wait for the festival so much fun.
    You have wonderful friends. Love you Shay.

  2. Oh Shay, I am so sorry for all your pain and all the BS you are going through. I cry through most of your blogs–my prayers and wishes are with you. This has to get better — you will get better. You will get better.

  3. I so wish I lived closer so I could give you some help..but if you think you need me, I can be there. Just say the word… I know you must feel like a Mack truck ran over you..10 times… Or more…it’s ok to let things go…it’s ok to break down…hell..it’s ok to scream and kick and throw a tantrum…except you are likely too f-ing tired .. Maybe before the next round you could get some meals prepped and in the freezer to make it easier during that week… Just remember…you are more important than getting rid of dust balls.

    • I think some planning and a change of expectations on my part with help out a lot. Feeling good this morning. It makes me happy how fast I seem to bounce back. Not pert yet but better.

  4. Oh Shay, I am so sorry. Please text me if you ever need a ride or anything. I’m happy to drop off an Aidan friendly dinner too, or bring dog food. You know we have plenty around here. XOXO

  5. Shay you are a true inspiration, high expectations and a bit stubborn. I say Shay needs to let all her friends help her!!! We all want to!!! I am dropping off meals tomorrow and a couple for her freezer, even though she at 1st refused….as usual!!! Shay, sending you and your family love, hugs and prayers! Us ‘Sarcoma Girls’ are will always be there for you!! Love and in friendship, Lisa

  6. Shay–PLEASE let me know when you need a ride. I will make it happen! I think I was home on Monday. Thinking of you constantly…I guess I will have to be a better friend and be pushy and and do what I can to help. Sorry I was not there for you! LOVE, HUGS, and PRAYERS!!!

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